THE FIRST NIGHT

The first night was challenging and not what we were expecting. I don't exactly know what we were expecting, but there is no way to anticipate the experience. The first night home definitely did not go as I imagined. If I could give any advice to future parents it would be to keep the baby in your hospital room with you after he/she is born. Because Jackson was technically in the NICU we were not allowed to keep him with us at night. The nurses would just bring him down when they had the time to do so. I didn't know what kind of sleep schedule he had or how often he was fussy. I didn't even really know how often he wanted to eat, the nurses just brought him to me when they could.

Before I actually describe the first night I need to explain my expectations prior to his birth. This is where I must eat a little crow. I had this idea in my head that Jack would sleep in his own crib from day 1. Our room is 10 feet from his and we do not have much room to put in a bassinet. I just figured it would not be a big deal to walk the 10 feet down the hallway to get him when he woke at night. So at about midnight when we were to settle down to bed I realized that I was not ready for him to be so far away from me and that Dustin should move the pack 'n play into our room. The crib was so big for such a tiny person! Of course we were both exhausted and to add to that the pack 'n play would not fit down our hallway. Our friend John helped set up the pack 'n play and we did not pay close attention to how it was done. I think this event was the first test of our marriage as parents. It was 30 min, several swear words later and some whining about how tired I was and the pack 'n play was squeezed into our bedroom where it didn't really fit.

At this point I continued to have this fantasy in my head that Jackson was going to sleep in that strange bed by himself. It did not occur to me that this cold, soundless place may be a little foreign to him. We swaddled him in a blanket, rocked him to sleep and then placed him in this lonely place. He slept for a total of 30 min to 1 hour. When he woke I found him completely unswaddled and moving his arms and legs and crying. Dustin would then change his diaper, I would then feet him, rock him, swaddle him and again place him in the lonely pack 'n play. We repeated this process about every 30 min to an hour until after 3-4 times it finally hit me. The poor little guy had spent 9 months in a warm place, listening to my heartbeat and unable to flail his arms and legs in the cramped space. I then swaddled him the best I could and laid him on my side of the bed (Dustin was afraid he could crush him) and placed my hand on his. I found that if I would lie my hand on his this would prevent him from escaping the swaddle and waking himself with the unfamiliar movements of his hands. Once I made these revelations he then would sleep for a glorious 2 hours at a time.

In the days to follow the following adjustments were made to help provide the most comfortable sleeping pattern for both Jackson and his parents: 1. The implementation of the swaddling blanket. The blanket we have is called the Kiddopotamus and it uses Velcro that even a escape artist like ours cannot get out of. When I first put it on I was afraid he would choke to death, but no...he sleeps without waking himself with movements of his hands...I highly recommend it. 2. The purchase of a second Kiddopotamus. This if for when his diaper leaks through to the blanket. Yes it is that valuable. 3. The purchase of a co-sleeper. It is about half the size of the pack 'n play and does fit in our room. I am just not ready to put him in another room, in that big 'ole crib by himself. Jackson is still rocked to sleep and placed in the co-sleeper. He sleeps for the first 2-3 hours in this bed by himself. When he wakes we change in diaper, I feed him and then he spends the rest of the night next to mom sleeping for 2-3 hours at a time.

My thoughts of spoiling him by letting him in the bed went out the window. I do eventually want to get him in his own bed, but he will only be this little for a short time and it has to be hard making the transition of being with mom for every second of the day to sleeping alone. While what worked for us may not work for everyone this was how we rectified the turmoil of the first night. I am sure there are flaws to our plan, but I think this is what makes parents who they are and helps them learn the ins and outs of their own particular child. Whether right or wrong, Jackson seems happy and we are at least getting some sleep at night.